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How To Stop Being Manipulated Into Fighting Everyone Else’s Battle’s While Being A Coward In Your Own!

We dilute our effectiveness on our OWN lives when we over extend ourselves trying to be good Samaritans when we have not the resources from within to share.

Stop putting your neck in the guillotine for individuals who will use you down until you have nothing left. We must view these entities who enter into our lives and private spaces by the energy that they give off and take it on face value. No, I did not say take THEM on face value, I said take their ENERGY at face value! Too many times we judge a person by what is surrounding them instead of focusing on what THEY are individually and what THEY bring to the table of Karma! But many of us fall into that trap of getting caught up in the impressive production of distractions that these spiritual vampires depend on to drain you of any and all of your hard earn resources time and time again!

Why is it that we vouch for a stranger to whomever we’ve met in a church service one night and we really don’t know them from Jack? You wouldn’t open your world (Hopefully NOT but I have seen it happen unfortunately!) to a stranger on the street so why would you allow someone who you don’t know into your home and into your heart merely because they had a Bible in their hand and preface their statements with “God willing” and constantly say “Praise the Lord?”

When I hear all of that fluff I start seeing red flags especially when I don’t know this person. Many times a shyster knows that that is all he has to say and it works a like a charm!

I’m going to give it to you straight like this with no chaser, you must not be fooled by the position that a person holds in your life or the facade that they put up as the collateral for free entrance into your sensitive inner circle.

Observe their energy a NOTHING else! Whatever their energy displays to you, that’s what they are! How many times have we allowed an insincere individual a free pass to get away with things that are not commensurate with their facade! We honor their title so much to the point where we are afraid to call a spade a spade from the fear of disrespecting their title and THEY well know this and this is why it has worked so well for them down through the years with their damn deceitful games! How many church deacons, elders or even pastors are getting away with screwing down half of the females in their congregations but NO ONE will say a damn word because they hide behind the “touch not my anointed” defense but they keep on doing exactly what they want to do with the full support of their brainwashed flock?

Vouch for NO ONE other than yourself! It takes to much out of you to live your live defending the shortcomings of those who don’t even plan on OVERCOMING their shortcomings!

If this is you then just dig a hole and jump into it right now because you will never have a life that will ever be free of someone else’s agenda and NOT yours!

Look into a persons energy and observe it over a time regardless as to their position! Grandma can be a gossiping smiling hell-raiser who is envious that her life didn’t turn out as well as the daughter whom she secretly disliked all of those years as the daughter was on her own with NO help from anyone and struggled just to make ends meet. Now that her daughter found a good type of man that SHE could never attract, guess who she now smears every chance she can get? But when questions are levied about her devious character, she plays the sweet little old lady roll and blurs your judgment from those favorite little pies that she “loves” to bake for you.

You might have a manager on your job who sees the potential that you have to go high up in the company more so than they could because of your scholastic achievements, magnetic personality, excellent communication skills and total knowledge of your craft. This manager appears to be someone who truly wants to help you go high on the corporate ladder by spending extra time with you, making suggestions that always seem to work and just being an overall plus to all of your career efforts. But the day comes where you find out that they have been undermining you at every turn by attempting to take the credit for all of the wonderful accomplishments in the company that you have achieved in such a short time and the only reason that they played buddy-buddy with you so close was to give off the impression that maybe they WERE the one to really be the mastermind behind your accomplishments because “they were always together!”

But the sad part is we will fight to the end in defending the “squeaky clean character” of these very entities who are undermining the divine efforts of your very life!

At a certain point in ones life they should KNOW what they desire out of life, they should have a strong idea on how to get there and they should be aligning themselves with those who are driven in the same manner, not wasting precious time on matters that are not conducive to the daily victories that will bring you closer to your ideal life.

For those with military backgrounds, you know that you can only go but so far before you must get cleared at a checkpoint. Now while I don’t have any experience in the military I do understand that this is for the security of the base so that nothing as far as equipment or weaponry can go where it is not supposed to as well as items that are banned from the grounds being brought in. Now for those of us living the civilian life that is not a hard concept to understand, it’s actually a wonderful way of absorbing what I feel IS an important concept in how we should take the time to allow others into our life.

We need to take time when allowing a foreign entity into the inner circle of our lives. We don’t seem to do that anymore. There doesn’t seem to be any rules for the preservation of our personal security and well being. We are just “out there” with no protection just waiting to be “plucked at will” like a free swinging grape off of a wild vine! And if we seem to have some sort of standards to our existence, it is met with a dumb look on the face of the person who is supposed to know better but refuses to because he/she doesn’t want to be bothered by that “old fashion foolishness!”

This is how those predatory entities come into our lives so easily because they “test” the waters of the protocols of decency and when they are met with NO resistance and NO correction, they know inherently that they have a “future fool” here from which to suck the life from. And let me tell you, once they have come to the conclusion that you are theirs for the taking, it is hard to hit the rewind button and make them respect your personal boundaries and high standards of decency. For example ladies, a man to whom you have dated is finally invited inside of your home BRIEFLY. Meaning that he may have been invited in after a short afternoon doing some mutual food shopping and he is only entering your home for the first time ONLY to help you bring in the groceries. No funny business has been non verbally or verbally communicated and so far he has been the consummate gentleman across the board and you know him in so many different facets of his life personally and professionally to not expect anything but PERFECT behavior as he helps you with the task. (Now understand that I am making this up as I go along, this scenario could have gotten to this point in a million ways! So do stretch your imagination in order to see the point that I am making!)

Now! He helps…….let me correct that, he brings ALL of the groceries into your kitchen from the car and you decide to offer him something to drink (Non-alcoholic of course, because in my book when a woman offers a man in HER home something alcoholic to drink, that MAY be a hint for something more. Not always, but a flag would go up in my head! Maybe I’m wrong though, I’ve been out of that game for so long! LOL!.), he accepts…….and of course the insinuation is that he can spend a “little” more time there as I don’t think she would expect him to drink it down in record time the way Rocky (Sylvester Stallone) drank down the raw eggs before he did his roadwork in the movie Rocky and run out of the door in record time. No. It means that he could stay for the time it takes to finish the drink along with a little small talk unless SHE offers for him to spend the evening (Or night, that’s on you! You ARE both adults now! LOL!)

Now as a gentleman, after the drink is completed and provided he is still in the kitchen, he SHOULD thank her for the beverage as he moves toward the sink in an attempt to wash the glass. It’s proper manners to do so in this case to say the least. If she tells him that he was welcome for the refreshment, but he doesn’t have to wash the glass, he should insist softly, or just rinse it out quickly before putting it in the sink. END OF SHOPPING DATE! It’s time to LEAVE! Let her mention the time that they could once again spend a proper date together. Don’t be slow of foot like you don’t want to leave, even if you really don’t. Timing is everything. If she rolls with this then mention to her that you have a few minor things to do later on as this will give her the perfect excuse to walk you to the door and for her to have her precious “me time” and to think of what a perfect wonderful gentleman you have been. Maybe. And that’s a big maybe, she just might call you back later on that night after your “imaginary chores” have been completed for you to spend a quiet romantic (He must come with absolutely NO expectations of this and act surprised IF she answers the door in an after bath sheer and slinky outfit with some candles burning throughout her place! his is the payoff that us gentleman DO get sometime, so men, PLEASE do yourself a favor and pick up a book on proper etiquette! LOL!) evening with her. WINE INCLUDED!

Now, back to my original point! MOST hucksters and shysters who are also spiritual vampires would have attempted to stay at your place after helping you with the groceries. Men like this would have invited themselves PAST you in YOUR home to see how nice your place really is. Many would find themselves in your bathroom only to ramble through your medicine cabinet to see your private business and then PLOP their crude uncultured slothful asses on your sofa while in one swoop of a movement grabbing your flat-screen’s remote control to tell YOU that he wants to watch “the game” while you do whatever it was that you planned on doing that evening.

That game “in HIS mind” will last about two hours. Enough time to see your movements and maybe wiggle his way into your bedroom.


Girl. This is a predator. Put his ass in check at the very moment of violation! Not later. Not in two minutes. RIGHT NOW!

Zero tolerance.

Do NOT worry about hurting his feelings. He does not obviously care about stepping on YOUR toes now doesn’t he?

Before I say anymore, if YOU DO NOT check him on the spot you will have a problem faster than if you tongue kissed a man with a bad case of the flu!

Read his actions back to him like a cheap novel and let him know that this “ain’t” that kind of show. Make him retreat back to that facade (Now you KNOW it was all an outside show!) of decency as he gets up and out of your place NEVER to return back again!

Is this too harsh maybe?

HECK NO! (Do know that I could have used another very popular four letter word that we probably hear everyday in the streets but my vocabulary is a bit too large for that. You get the point. Plus, I’ve already used my daily allotted limit on the word “ass” in this blog)

It’s NOT harsh because a man who does know class and culture who all of a sudden abandons it abruptly in a more intimate setting in your presence is full of GAME! HE should be the one setting the example even IF you were trying to seduce him in the first place! Now I am NOT saying that you are that type of woman now but a real gentleman who knows how to treat a lady will ALWAYS keep her “moist” (You know what I am talkin’ ‘BOUT!) at the thought of him because he has so much more finesse and dignified “range” than those ever horny friction hungry goons out there who will jump on anything just to feel an orgasm with a warm body!

This is the way that women and men get tested to see if they are victims. If our female example here would have allowed her “guest” to dictate how HER evening went without her permission, she would have found herself down the line with a man who moved in with her and probably took control not only of HER finances but her whole entire existence to boot!

You think not?

Well how do you think those incredible “Jerry Springer” type of jacked up situations begin in the first place?

It always starts with a small test. A small loan that never gets repaid. Use of your vehicle for a day with the gas tank returned empty when it was full when taken. Always being the one to foot the tab at the restaurant, the signs are always there.

Now I can write for days with examples of how people can come into your life, hijack it like a bad computer virus and shut down your own peace of mind literally overnight but I do think you get the point. Never be afraid to defend YOUR best interests even when no one else will. There are some who will even try to make YOU feel bad for always sticking up for yourself and tell you that this the reason why you don’t have a mate. Do NOT listen to them because how can someone else tell you what is best for you when they do now stand in YOUR shoes? Always follow your gut as to who you allow in your life and NEVER be afraid to cut the strings if you suspect foul play or devious intentions. It’s better to be called a crazy person WHILE maintaining your sanity than to actually GO CRAZY because your sanity was stolen from you because you were driven out of your mind from a bad situation! Call me whatever you want but when I go home after work at night I go there with peace of mind and with NO OUTSIDE DRAMA!

It’s sad to say but these days many can’t even say that!

Peace of mind – Once you lose it, it is SO HARD to get back! Once you finally get it, fight like a madwoman/man to keep it!

When you do this it is called FIGHTING YOU OWN BATTLES! And it is a WHOLE lot better than fighting someone elses!

Wouldn’t you agree?

I will see you tomorrow night! Let me think up what our next blog topic will be!

Peace!

About The Author

LANCESCURV IS A SOCIAL MEDIA PROVOCATEUR | ILLUSTRATOR/CARTOONIST | PODCASTER | CULTURE CRITIC | DIGITAL NOMAD | NYC BORN & RAISED | WHO FOCUSES ON THE INTRICACIES OF HUMAN NATURE, TRENDING NEWS & THOUGHT-PROVOKING TOPICS OF INTEREST.

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