Before we speak about Mrs. Killjoy, allow me to share a few thoughts on what motivates me here in cyberspace day in and day out with my expressions on the human experience.
When I began this blog site several years ago I made a commitment to expressing myself in the most authentic manner possible by not holding back on how I feel on the broad issues of all things human nature.
I knew that this would automatically separate my efforts from the vast sea of other bloggers who try so very hard to fit into the perceived categories of denial that would cause others to embrace them wholeheartedly.
Why is this?
…….it’s because most people do not want to hear a true assessment of the sad reality around them nor do they truly desire to ever hear the truth.
This concept alone I knew would definitely keep me from being popular, but this is the way I’ve always chosen to live my life as I fearlessly call it like I see it no matter how deep those in my midst push their heads in the sand.
And this credo goes for whatever I feel like addressing at the moment through my expressions on multiple platforms.
Whether it be a written piece on the state of relationships or a particular aspect thereof, or maybe a on local activism level that will ruffle the feathers of the longtime powers that be.
Now with all of that being said, I need to share some long accrued psychological data with the world that I feel would give a unique perspective when dealing with the entity that I will refer to as Mrs. Killjoy.
Why have I decided to write about this now?
Well after speaking with a few acquaintances on their particular relationship issues, overhearing the conversations of countless strangers who happened to be the men who were married to the Mrs. Killjoy prototype as well as a known pairing of mine from the past, I felt it was time to add my two cents on this cold calculating chameleon of a sadistic hurt-mate.
Mrs. Killjoy always seems to emerge through the clouds of confusion during the throes of extreme loneliness that once was a upon a time the story of every mans life.
In other words, when she appears in a man’s path she seems to be the best thing that could ever happen to him and even as he has the time to thoroughly investigate her intentions he has no choice now but to believe that dreams do come true.
She takes the time to shine those beautiful loving and heartwarming rays of sunshine down upon his formerly gloomy world and takes the time like no one else has to learn him inside and out.
She also takes the time to hone her physical beauty to the highest levels of excellence and presents an irresistible visual to this man who has been deprived of the rare combination of personality, beauty, intelligence and raw sensuality.
Where he once gave up on the prospects of ever beholding those ever elusive joys of true love, he can’t deny that the overwhelming saturation of constant and seemingly unlimited supply of passion has seeped into the tiniest love resistant crevices of his now melting heart.
He’s in love…….and no matter how good it feels he still tries to find a way to get a grip on himself and his perception of this swiftly evolving reality because although it feels so good, it is not a comfortable plane for him to be in because all so new to his previously tortured soul.
Tortured? Sure. Most good men can share with you the almost unbelievable tales of all that has been lost because of love and live with the regret of what could have been achieved if they didn’t make the bad choices that they did with good intentions in choosing a woman who ended up being the complete opposite of what they claimed to be their character standards.
Many a great potential has been destroyed because of an assassination of the heart after dealing with a woman who stole their life force like a vampire sucking the blood of their victim under the cover of a moonlit night.
This is exactly what Mrs. Killjoy does, not only will she drain a good man of his life force that he at one time possessed in abundance, but she completely rewires the basic makeup of his mind to see the world as a place that is so intimidating that he now lacks the confidence to move forward into it without her presence by his side.
He is a defeated soul now lacking to drive to accomplish anything out in the world without her approval.
He has become merely a shell of his former self and technically a trained puppy who very existence now is to do her bidding at the snap of a finger when she so desires.
She will dole out the esteem boosting statements to recharge this empty vessel of a man enough so that he will have the enthusiasm and fire to accomplish the deeds needed for the selfish agenda of her private world.
She will then promptly proceed to tear him down after it’s been completed as she can leave him with no extra enthusiasm laying around to fuel an emotional and physical escape away from her deadly clutches and mighty grip.
Mrs. Killjoy has permeated his mind when he thought the times were good and she has unbeknownst to him rewired his total outlook on life so completely different than what it was when she met him.
And like a tool put down in the toolbox he sits in an idle manner until she activates him back to life to satisfy her selfish whims.
But he will never be allowed to indulge himself in that ever diminishing world of social interaction that once was his as his once great list of friends, acquaintances and contacts have slowly vanished over the years only to leave him as the elusive entity that he has now become.
Only the memories are left for him, and they are haunting indeed…….
He often thinks back to the times when life was this wonderful place that he couldn’t get enough of with the boundless energy that he once possessed and the magical enthusiasm to conquer all personal goals effortlessly in such a fulfilling manner.
He also tries hard to figure out what went wrong in his life and how is it that he allowed himself to fall so far down into the brooding confused individual that he is today.
Mrs. Killjoy is the master of mental and spiritual infiltration.
She specializes in attaining control of an outwardly successful man who has an emotional crack in his armor that is concealed and well hidden from the world.
For it is from that small crack in his emotional makeup that has allowed her to gain entry to win his confidence and heart, setting him up for the damage that will later arrive at her very deceptive and cunning hands.
She proceeds to fill that gap so well and he feels even more alive than ever before and credits his new found love greatly for the change that he feels in his life.
He gives her a deeper entry into what makes him tick and allows her to know his dreams, fears, aspirations, idiosyncrasies and frailties.
After a time she knows every nook and cranny of his essence and has complete control over every aspect of this man’s life while he hasn’t a clue as to who he has allowed to command the wheel of the boat that recently has been his life.
As the entrusted captain of his ship, he doesn’t care to micromanage the direction of his life anymore never realizing that his previously intended direction will never be reached because the new captain of the ship has hijacked his life only to find it in some very strange waters indeed.
Mrs. Killjoy feeds off of pain.
When Mrs. Killjoy appears to be the author of bliss, satisfaction and joy for her man, this is when she is most deadly because it is merely a set up to incur a great pain in his heart because this is the time when he is most vulnerable as she will abruptly snatch the happiness he feels as she despises any and all pleasure that he experiences in the first place.
She feels a strange intense pleasure from his pain and will always find herself right there to witness his frustration to siphon as much as she can like the spiritual leech that she is.
What most who are allowed in the inner circle of their life don’t know is that while she is his biggest cheerleader publicly, behind closed doors and out of sight she is his most deadly nemesis to any semblance of a complete happy life as it is her job to make sure that he doesn’t ever “have it all!”
If he appears to be happy and is getting some measure of innocent satisfaction from an outside source, she will pull back any support of his happiness immediately to counterbalance his pleasure with pain.
The funny thing is that these actions are executed right up under his nose and years can go by before he appears detects the twisted actions of sabotage completed from the very person who should feel simply wonderful every time he does.
You see, while most women who have a good man in their life would want the world for him as he would normally want for her, Mrs. Killjoy is quite the opposite, as his complete happiness is totally unacceptable and out of order! “How dare he be happy?”
So whether this good man knows it or not, he has accepted the full wrath of an inherited generational curse that was never a part of his family lineage and legacy.
In order to win him over in the first place Mrs. Killjoy had to emulate all that he thought were the qualities of a great woman and project this onto him in the hopes that he will fall for the bait.
When the relationship and union was consummated, he unknowingly gave the underbelly of the dark evil netherworld a free pass for all of her personal demons to enter into the inner recesses of his life and to make him feel the weight of their oppressive presence on his soul.
This in turn gave her a modicum of relief for she now had an unsuspecting loving fool of a partner who signed away decades of his life to struggle with the issues that she was too weak to face herself before joining on to another.
Mrs. Killjoy’s poor mate must suffer the consequences of her vindictive soul, as she only sees him as her personal garbage pail whose only purpose in life is to dump her centuries old toxicities into him every time she craves to do so. This is why she will never finish him off by pushing him into the realm of insanity because she has to have him around for the prolonged dance of dysfunction that she’s know all too well growing up.
She will keep him weak enough to stay to do her bidding and strong enough barely to finish those tasks but not enough to propel himself out of her world.
The basic makeup of Mrs. Killjoy is quite different than the stereotypical man-eater or gold digger who strikes swiftly to take what they want of a man’s resources to vanish forevermore after the deed has been done. No! Mrs. Killjoy actually feels that she is in a complete relationship and that her arrangement brings a balance to her life regardless if it brings hell to her mate.
She uses her near perfect proportions to keep him drained from the sex that SHE gives him WHEN she chooses to do so. It is not out of a desire to please him but a need to control and corral him. For the most part their twisted one sided non exchange of a sex life consists of her being serviced orally while he is left to fend for his own needs manually away and out of site while she drifts off into a peaceful slumber. While he is left with a stomach full of her freshly released juices and gonads that are so full of seed that haven’t been allowed to be set free at all in her presence unless she commands such a sideshow for her own amusement.
Again she will always maintain the image of perfection to the world when in those very public situations when a Colgate smile and the glowing testimonies of how her marriage is simply marvelous while her husband stands by her side well within the cross-hairs of her deadly gaze as a threat that he better play along with the public script of deception. For to execute any type of communication to the world whether it be a frowning face, displeased body language or even a wise crack that was uttered would bring down the wrath of her once privacy is attained.
The perfect image must be maintained at all costs!
She also will keep this now browbeaten man “in check” by speaking to him in public as though he is her child. She knows exactly what she is doing and continues to do so as she pleases no matter how bad it looks to others who would never do such a thing to their mate and expect to keep them in their lives forever.
I feel that it’s a shame that so many men are held captive by the Mrs. Killjoy’s of the world merely because of her tortured childhood and the love that she never received throughout. Be very careful when you find someone who appears to be too good to be true and know that if she is the real thing she will be around over the long haul.
Mrs. Killjoy never wants to take the time to allow you to get to know her on the level of casual contact. She is so terrified of being discovered and simply cannot wait to move closer in a mature manner because her demons are like those stereotypical street pimps who will smack you down when the quota of cash hasn’t been met.
This is why she’ll appear as perfection to make you forgot how short of a time you both really knew each other.
Mrs. Killjoy will make it damn near impossible for you to leave because she has taken complete control of the money flow and leaves no excess up for grabs that will allow you to leave at a moments notice when she is distracted and focused on something else.
Know where to draw the line in any relationship as the trust has to be earned long before the marriage manifests or else you risk being just another old man years from now sitting on a garbage can in the street pissed off that your life could have been so different if you never married Mrs. Killjoy.
Think about it. You can save yourself the pain of losing your most productive years if you do so.
Peace & Righteous Love Always,
Your “Drama Free” Brother,