It never ceases to amaze me. The things we do for love…….
Once again we here at LanceScurv ponder the questions that most are afraid to answer.
The topic and inquiry of this week’s program is entitled “Will You Compromise Your Standards Just To Keep A Man?”
May I remind you that the title was worded in such a manner as if it were asking this question of women but in actuality we are including everyone and every lifestyle.
So many of us have in fact in the present or at one time in our lives did something to keep a mate that we wouldn’t usually do under the heading of being one who has righteously compromised in . But where does the line between compromising something simple end and going overboard to sell ourselves short begin?
You know that you have compromised your standards when you look back on a relationship that has ended and regretted what you did to keep that man…….
“I don’t know WHAT I was thinking to give in to the idea of having a threesome with my man and another woman especially now that he ran off with her and I’ve been left all alone looking like a fool! What made matters worse was HE was somebody that I met at the club two months ago and SHE was my lifelong childhood friend! Seems like you can’t bend a little at all to keep your man happy anymore!”
“I usually don’t lend anyone any money unless I give it not expecting it back, but when I allowed my man to use my retirement money for this sure fire business venture that he convinced me to get into, I had no clue that he wasn’t even a citizen of this country and vanished into thin air with my 338,000 dollars and back to Nigeria!”
“My girlfriend was going through some really rough times and she had to leave an abusive man so I let her come and live with me until she got on her feet, little did I know that the process of ‘getting on her feet’ would still be something that I would be waiting to happen three years after she first came through the door!”
“How was I supposed to figure out that something was going on when every time that my visiting girlfriends would leave to go home that my kind husband was volunteering to drive them all home but always dropped Sheila off last because SHE was his dessert! I packed his shit and took it right over to Sheila’s and left it right at her front door while his car was brazenly parked in her driveway! I never heard from either one ever again but will definitely see him soon as our court date is coming up fast for our divorce! Hallelujah!”
While the examples above may be a bit extreme of what could happen when you compromise your standards, it is nonetheless a reality for many and just might not be as spectacular as what is really happening out in the world when your hear of the amazing stories that people go through.
I will refrain from preaching but I must say this – hindsight is always 20/20 and to compromise your standards is a surefire way to find yourself in sad state of affairs and surely without the prize of a mate that you thought you would have in the end!
But for some reason human nature is a stubborn thing and we always seem to think that we can break the rules or overstep the boundaries that others have always failed to defeat.
So we continue to fill the newspaper headlines as well as being the center of the beauty salon gossip topics because we just don’t get it and some of us never will!
If you don’t believe in sharing your mate then don’t do it because someone will TAKE THEM!
If you are not the type who feels comfortable loaning money to anyone, then don’t do it because PEOPLE STEAL!
If you don’t open you doors to anyone even if it is for a night, then never go against that because only YOU will feel the weight of carrying a dead weight do nothing through life!
If you must always know what your man is doing then don’t feel bad that you are nagging him, you just might be keeping a bad situation from happening because the minute he is out of your sight your best friend might be giving him that little variety that he surely doesn’t need!
Is it a sense of low self esteem that pushes us to “give in” and override our standards so that we can ensure that we keep that special someone in our life or will they detect that breach of personal standards and read it as a sense of desperation from you and feel like he has an upper hand to take advantage of you?
Or are your standards and expectations possibly too high and you hurt yourself time and time again when you have to drop them because they were just to artificially inflated in the first place to allow a person the breathing room to feel free to love?
Time: Friday, September 14, 2012 @ 10 p.m. Eastern Standard Time
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