Marriage, a sacred institution that has stood the test of time, has always demanded a delicate balance of roles and responsibilities. Traditionally, the husband provides food, shelter, protection, and security, while the wife offers love, respect, nurturing, and a sense of peace in the home. But in the Western world, particularly in the United States, the scales seem to have tipped in favor of the woman, leaving many men to wonder if marriage is truly worth the risk. Let’s take a deep dive into this union, dissect the pros and cons, and ultimately raise the question: Is marriage in the Western world still a viable option for men today?
Just A Bit Of Clarification
But before we dig deep into this topic, I want to make it clear and let it be known that this is not about bashing women or the sanctity of womanhood. This is just a reflection of the realities that many men have gone through and what marriage has become for those guys. I have a very healthy outlook personally on the state of marriage because I was raised in a home where each role was executed properly. When there was a disagreement or a gray area, I observed my parents taking the time to work it out.
I also have to say that many men and women jumped into marriages too fast without taking the time to ask the necessary questions of each other, going in with surgical precision and leaving no stone unturned. This is very important for any marriage to work. I remember browsing through the aisles of a Barnes & Noble many years ago, looking at various books and categories that I usually don’t seek out. This is the way I expand my mentality, by absorbing material that’s beyond my literary comfort zone. While walking down one of these aisles, I spotted a book on the crucial questions that a couple should ask before entering marriage. My curiosity pushed me to reach for the book and browse through it, and I can say it was nothing less than fascinating.
I’ll say this: that book covered every possible question one could ask of their mate and of themselves in order to never have an uncomfortable moment after tying the knot. The authors of this book took the time to realistically explore topics such as upbringing, personal idiosyncrasies, all aspects of marriage, sexual do’s and don’ts, fetishes and secret desires, and financial attitudes toward money—for example, if one is a big spender without budgeting while the other is frugal and spends only when necessary within the budget. This book was so fascinating that I couldn’t help but spend the next three hours reading through it. I said to myself that if every couple read through this book and answered the questions to each other honestly, there would be no divorces. But the catch is that you have to sit down with your potential marriage partner and honestly go through this book. The discussion sessions, if done properly, would have taken well over a year if indulged in honestly three or four times a year.
Also, if the ladies who read this article feel that it is too slanted to one side, I would be happy to write the other side of the equation on what women may feel are issues of concern from their perspective, to be fair. Thank you for your understanding, and please feel free to request what aspects specifically that you’d like for me to cover.
The Unspoken Truth About Marriage Laws in the West
Let’s not mince words here – marriage laws in America are often a one-way street, and the man is usually the one driving against traffic. If a man fails to provide the expected financial support, the state will be more than happy to swoop in, forcing him to comply through court orders, garnishments, or even jail time. But what about the wife’s end of the bargain? Where’s the law that says she must keep the romance alive, ensure the home is a sanctuary, or maintain the intimacy that keeps a marriage vibrant? Spoiler alert: there isn’t one.
You see, the government is quick to enforce the man’s side of the marital duties but mysteriously silent when it comes to the woman’s. A man can end up losing his house, his savings, and even a portion of his future earnings in a divorce settlement if things go south. But if a wife decides to deny her husband the respect, affection, or intimacy that was once promised, there’s no recourse for him. This imbalance makes marriage feel less like a partnership and more like a legally sanctioned game of Russian Roulette where the man always has the loaded chamber.
The Importance of Romance and an Active Sex Life
Now, let’s address the elephant in the room – intimacy. Men need regular sexual satisfaction, just as women need emotional connection. It’s a basic human need, a stress reliever, and a way to maintain the bond that drew you to each other in the first place. Too often, we hear about wives who, after the honeymoon phase, suddenly treat intimacy as a bargaining chip or an optional extra.
Ladies, let’s be clear: men are not machines built just to provide, protect, and repair everything that breaks around the house. We need that physical connection. It’s not about being selfish; it’s about maintaining the emotional glue that holds a marriage together. When a man is deprived of this essential aspect, he feels unappreciated, unwanted, and unloved. And when this happens, the marriage slowly withers away into a mundane routine that neither partner enjoys.
Men often find themselves walking on eggshells, hoping not to be labeled as ‘needy’ or ‘demanding’ when they express their desire for intimacy. But in truth, a healthy sex life is just as important for a man’s well-being as it is for a woman’s. It reduces stress, boosts confidence, and fosters a deeper emotional connection. And no, this isn’t about “taking care of your man” – it’s about meeting each other’s needs and ensuring that both partners feel fulfilled and appreciated.
The Financial Pitfalls: Child Support, Alimony, and the Family Court System
One of the most glaring issues in Western marriages is the financial risks men face. If a marriage ends, the man often finds himself shackled by the chains of child support and alimony, even if the marriage fell apart due to the wife’s actions or lack of commitment. Let’s not even talk about the nightmare that is the family court system – it’s a place where logic goes to die, and a man’s wallet is left to bleed out.
For instance, did you know that in some states, a man can be required to pay alimony for the rest of his life if he was married for over a certain number of years? Yes, you read that correctly. Lifetime alimony. While a woman can remarry, live her best life, and continue to collect a check from her ex-husband, he could be left struggling to make ends meet. Now, you tell me – how is that fair?
And what about the infamous child support laws? They are often calculated in a way that doesn’t take into account the father’s ability to sustain himself after making those payments. Many good men who genuinely want to support their children are forced into poverty, working multiple jobs just to keep up with the demands of a system that sees them as nothing more than a walking ATM. Meanwhile, some women exploit this system to live comfortably without contributing fairly.
The Perils of False Domestic Violence Claims
This is where things get dark. In some cases, women have resorted to manufacturing domestic violence claims, sometimes even harming themselves just to gain the upper hand in a divorce or custody battle. I have been through this several times PERSONALLY! The police are called, the man is arrested, and before he can even blink, his reputation is ruined, and his rights are stripped away. The system is set up to “believe all women,” which in many cases is absolutely necessary, but it also leaves the door wide open for those who wish to exploit it for personal gain.
Is There Hope for Men in Marriage?
Let’s not pretend marriage is all doom and gloom – there are countless couples who have built beautiful, loving, and enduring partnerships and I will never become that bitter old guy who discourages other men from taking that powerful life-giving step. But the reality is that the legal framework in place makes marriage a far riskier endeavor for men than it used to be. Men today need to weigh the pros and cons very carefully before saying, “I do.”
Yes, marriage can offer companionship, emotional support, and a sense of stability. But if a woman isn’t genuinely committed to fulfilling her end of the marital bargain, is it worth the potential financial, emotional, and psychological devastation that could follow?
Roles and Responsibilities: A Balanced Partnership
For marriage to work, there must be an understanding of roles and responsibilities from the beginning. The man traditionally provides protection, financial support, and leadership. In turn, the woman is expected to bring love, respect, nurturing, and create a peaceful home environment. When both partners honor their commitments, the marriage can thrive.
But if one party (and let’s be honest, it’s often the wife in Western marriages) feels entitled to the benefits without upholding her responsibilities, it creates resentment and imbalance. Men should feel just as secure in the love and support of their wives as women feel in the provision and protection of their husbands.
Final Thoughts: Should Men Get Married in the Western World?
So, is marriage still worth it? It depends on who you ask and what you’re willing to risk. For some men, the potential rewards of a loving, supportive partner far outweigh the risks. For others, the thought of losing everything they’ve worked for to a partner who might not hold up her end of the deal is a risk they’re not willing to take.
Marriage should be a union where both partners uplift, support, and respect each other, but in the Western world, the legal and societal framework makes it a gamble with high stakes for men. Until laws become more balanced and women genuinely understand that men need more than just a paycheck to thrive, the question of whether marriage is worth it for men will remain a hotly debated topic.
If you’re a man considering marriage, proceed with caution. Understand the potential pitfalls, have honest conversations about expectations, and make sure you’re entering into a partnership that respects and values what you bring to the table. Because at the end of the day, marriage should be about building a life together, not tearing each other down.
Please let me hear your take on this very sensitive topic in the comment area below,
Thank you for being here, your presence is always appreciated,
LanceScurv
